Director | Harding University Center for Leadership and Development)
Clarity is kindness.
My colleague Dr. Rhonda Ellis uses this brilliant phrase. When giving or receiving feedback or information, she emphasizes that “Clarity is kindness.” The beauty of the phrase is its simplicity. The power of the phrase is its truth.
Clarity is kindness.
For the entirety of my adult life, my occupation has centered on words – on the ways we use them and too often abuse them. My earliest jobs were in marketing and publishing, followed by a dozen years of teaching college undergraduates how to write, speak, and think more effectively – how to better use words.
My PhD is in Writing, Rhetoric, and Technical Communication. Yes, that’s right. I am, in fact, a Word Doctor. I’ve dedicated my career to helping people become better writers and communicators, which leads them to become better leaders, employees, spouses, parents, and friends.
Clarity of thought.
Clarity of vision.
Clarity of communication.
These are gifts we give to those around us when we are intentional and clear with our words.
Words are both my superpower and my Kryptonite. I know how to string them together according to the grammar rules of writing, and I know how to break those rules when the time is right. I know how to create a persona or voice through clever punctuation and intentional pauses, and I know how syntax and diction work together in meaningful ways. And yet, and yet, I can get so caught up in the potential of those rhetorical devices that I lose sight of the message itself. Without clarity, we cannot be strong communicators or strong leaders. Clarity requires focus. It requires intentionality.
I’m in my fourth year of directing the Master of Arts in Organizational Leadership at Harding University, and with each new academic year, I become more and more convinced that the study of leadership is the study of words. Leadership lives in communication. In fact, leadership is communication. Good leaders are always good communicators. The two qualities are codependent in the healthiest ways.
In my Organizational Communications class, I teach Nonviolent Communication (NVC) methods. I first encountered NVC many years ago when I stumbled onto Marshall Rosenburg’s Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life. Later I found a simple, straightforward text called Words That Work in Business by Ike Lasater, which leans heavily on Rosenburg’s work. I quickly became an NVC advocate. The NVC approach requires clear and kind messaging – regardless of whether we are engaging in self-talk or in dialogue with others. Kind communicators are clear communicators.
The NVC method is best explained with what Lasater calls the training wheels sentence:
"When I see/hear [observation], I feel [feeling], because I need [need]."
Simple enough. Easy to apply. Incredibly powerful.
I’ve used the training wheels sentence in volatile negotiations, in complicated situations, in simple email exchanges, and in daily discussions with people I love and people I’ve just met. I believe the training wheels sentence can smooth out most communication wrinkles, but I know some people are uncomfortable with the idea of “nonviolent communication.” If NVC and its training wheels sentence seems too touchy-feely for you, then ISBAR is another good tool to keep in your leadership toolbox.
ISBAR, which stands for Identify, Situation, Background, Assessment, Recommendation, is another approach focused on intentional, clear communication. ISBAR originated in healthcare settings to help medical professionals reduce critical miscommunication errors. Luckily, the model can be used in other contexts with equally positive results. Communicators using ISBAR:
Identify: Identify themselves and their role or position
Situate: state the purpose or reason for communicating
Background: provide the relevant history or what I like to call the backstory
Assess: state what the communicator believes is most important or most crucial
Recommend: propose a recommendation or a next step
A combination of NVC and ISBAR can help anyone navigate virtually every communication situation. Teaching and modeling these methods improves the quality of communication in any organization.
Another well-worn book that offers insight on the impact and importance of clarity is Marcus Buckingham’s The One Thing You Need to Know. Buckingham argues that leaders – all leaders from any type of organization – must master consistent clarity. Consistent clarity refers to clear thoughts, clear communication, and consistent, persistent communication. In other words, leaders must clearly understand and clearly share the organization’s purpose – and they must share that purpose often. Consistent clarity means leaders clearly articulate the organization’s metrics of progress and clearly cast a compelling vision. Buckingham urges leaders to religiously filter out the distractions and (mis)information cluttering their inboxes, offices, and minds. Maintaining a clear focus on the purpose and mission, or what Jim Collins refers to as the organization’s hedgehog concept, requires maintaining clarity of thought and clearly communicating purpose, progress, and potential.
I’m grateful to work within an institution where words like compassion, civility, empathy, and love pepper the mission, vision, and values statements. I’m grateful to be in a place where kind gestures are far more common than unkind ones, where employees strive to treat one another with respect and patience, and where it’s more common to share prayer requests than harsh words. I know I’m lucky to be surrounded by kind people. Kindness is a choice we must make over and over again, especially when it is hard to be kind. Clarity is also a choice we must make over and over again, especially when it is hard to do so. We must be intentional in honing our thoughts and words because clarity is kindness.
To be clear and kind requires what leadership scholar Stephen Swensen calls the five “Kindness Behaviors.” These behaviors improve communication and engender workplace satisfaction. They are:
Seek to Understand: Ask good, authentic questions with humility.
Authentically Appreciate: Recognize the inherent value and gifts of those around us with authentic gratitude.
Model Mentoring: Support one another and build a community of mentorship.
Foster Belonging: Welcome all colleagues with respect and empathy.
Aim for Reasonable Transparency: Be as transparent as possible as often as possible.
Swensen’s Kindness Behaviors look a lot like loving our neighbors and are aligned well with the Golden Rule. Unsurprisingly, Kindness Behaviors also contribute to a healthy workplace culture.
If you’ve ever struggled with communicating effectively, I encourage you to try the NVC training wheels sentence. Practice ISBAR. Lean into Kindness Behaviors. Becoming a more intentional, effective communicator means becoming a much more effective leader.
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